The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do.
~Walter Bagehot as found nestled inside my dessert at a Chinese restaurant.
Maybe it’s my contrarian nature, but when I received this message from a fortune cookie, I carried that little slip of paper around in my wallet for YEARS. I loved doing what others thought impossible – I relished proving people wrong, breaking barriers and achieving what others perceived to be unachievable.
It has served me well in many ways as it emboldens me to do difficult things:
Move across the country (or more accurately, zig-zag), to start fresh every few years. ✔
Quit my job and start my own gig with no clear source of immediate income. ✔
Fly a plane, trek to see the gorillas, cycle through Vietnam, get certified in yoga, Pilates, enneagram and many more. ✔ ✔ ✔
I’m good at drowning out other people’s perceived limitations and charting my own path.
However, I am terrible at ignoring the very loudest critic: myself.
Its almost as if I do certain things in spite of others…but limit what my heart truly desires.
For instance, I have wanted to write a book for a few years – I get moments of inspiration, write furiously for a few weeks and then let it slip away. I’m excited to write a book – I think I have something to say and share with the world…I just don’t make the time to do it.
Why?
Probably a good question for my therapist, but I’m guessing there’s a fear of failure and rejection buried deep inside.
The problem with things buried down deep inside is they fester. When I think about the things I fear and what I have pushed down to ignore, I have visions of a moldy basement where creepy crawlies thrive. There a distinctive wet-newspaper scent; it’s dark and a little scary.
The only way to get rid of the detritus? You have to bring some light in; sweep through the cobwebs and look at the whole mess.
For me, with regards to a book, it starts with this post – I am shining a light on a deep desire. I am attempting to clear the clutter and to bring fresh air to what I really want.
I started thinking about perceived walls when Tony Lillios, PCC joined Sherry and me on the podcast. In so many ways, Tony is a guy who doesn’t see limitations and has achieved many amazing things. But there are a few places in his life where he plays just a bit smaller. Similar to me, it is usually self-limiting beliefs, and almost exclusively with things that are personally very important to him.
Check out Tony’s story hereor wherever you listen to podcasts.
And, consider: in what ways are you limiting yourself? What needs to be excised and brought forward to meet what you really want
