I used to think “balance” in my life was a place to get to – if I would just do a bit more yoga, have some more fun plans with friends, eat more veggies etc, I would arrive at a place called “Balance.” There was also a part of me that believed someone at work would notice (i.e., how hard I was working and the hours I was putting in) and would suggest maybe I slow down and find some more balance. If I’m being honest, there was also some part of me that believed maybe being out of balance, and tipping toward work was a bit of a badge of honor:
Look at me! I’m working really hard which means I’m super committed, and a good person!
NONE of this is true. Let’s start with the last.
Being out of balance did not make me a good person – in fact, it often made me a cranky person. While I was busy pursuing someone else’s version of success, I was getting burned out and, frankly, less successful at my job because I was too exhausted to perform well.
Seeking balance in your life actually makes you a better person. I’m not saying you shouldn’t kick ass at your job if that is one of your goals, but by establishing healthy boundaries, prioritizing what’s really important (in work and life), and consciously choosing how and when you spend your time, you’ll actually be a healthier, more productive you.
With regards to my second misplaced belief: I worked in HR for over 25 years and have seen many different companies in action. Trust me, no one is coming to your rescue. If you offer up your time, your company will take it. This does not make companies bad or evil: they are in the business of business and trying to maximize profits, impact, and success. Yes, I’ve had some good managers over the years who would notice if I was working super long hours or seemed burned out, but ultimately only YOU can create balance for yourself.
Finally, and maybe most difficult, there is no utopia called “balance.” Balance is not a static state. As a metaphor for what I’m talking about, try balancing on one foot. As you lift one foot off the floor, your standing leg, indeed your whole body will seek balance, but you will not stop moving. Even the most practiced yogi will make micro-adjustments as they try to balance on the one standing leg.
This is the same in our lives.
Sometimes, we are punching the accelerator hard on work; sometimes we throttle back to enjoy more family time or pursue a passion. Even when things seem really well balanced, life has a tendency to throw something at us and all of a sudden, we’re off-kilter and that feeling of balance is elusive.
So how can you seek balance? Sherry and I discussed this on our podcast this week. Take a listen here:: https://lnkd.in/gGHUEgbD, or wherever you listen to podcasts.
How is balance in your own life? I’d love to hear from you.
(picture: my dog Chandi deciding it was time for me to stop working)
